Un-Moving Images

Hello my friend,

Over the long weekend, I watched a lot of film, but it dawned on me that I have not told you about Atonement, a classic middle of the twentieth century romp, filled with light-hearted frivolity, and a touch of melodrama.
Really, it was your standard faire British period piece, whereby there is a large house or mansion filled with beautiful scenery, and there is a scandal involving the staff invoking all of the common themes of classism with the usual half decent imitations of British accents. (I can say this because the person I saw the movie with had a legitimate British accent and was mocking the various accents in the movie.) (Also, the bit about classism is practically part of the definition of "period piece"; if you think about any movie set at least fifty years in the past, one can see the identity of the movie hinging on the wealth gap disparity.) And this movie was very different than The Notebook because in the Notebook, the characters were played without the British accents.

I would like to come out of the film and say, that Keira Knightley, "she is one attractive and talented woman," but unfortunately although she did an adequate job playing her role as the torn love interest female (as opposed to the torn love interest male), but she did so, looking like she had recently overdosed on heroin (it was the opium of that time). She is stick thin and extremely pale, which would be funny, if I wasn't worried about her. (Yes, as usual, I come out of a period piece without laughs.) The woman who was seeking "atonement" was played well, by a cast of characters. Overall, the film was not that bad, but it was too filled with heavy themes, and various scenes were unconscionably poor, particularly the war scenes. So, guys out there, this is not a war movie to see with your buddies. Although, the fact that there was a token Black guy in the film was pretty funny, and if I were a Black guy, perhaps I would think to myself, "Hey, nice. Black guy in the movie, cool." Maybe, I would then think, "Okay, now I identify with this movie." I honestly have no idea. But, unfortunately, that moment of clarity didn't happen for me, and I was left wondering what that guy was doing there. I mean, I know they are the authors, and I am the audience, so they outrank me, but still, don't I deserve some sort of explanation?

But, more important than Michael Richards take on the movie, I would like to hear Elaine Benes's (the Julia Louise Dreyfuss character from Seinfeld) take on the it. Based on her viewings of the English patient, where she said about the bathtub sex, "That doesn't work... gimme something I could use." She would probably say the same thing about this movie, I mean c'mon, sex on a bookshelf? When was the last time you saw a bookself that sturdy? My bookself can't hold my chemistry text book, let alone, a person, let alone two people, let alone two people having "passionate" intercourse. (I was going back and forth about using a chemistry text book or an anatomy text book... but since I don't actually have either book I just chose by using chronological order.) Well, Elaine was fired for not liking the English Patient, as she prayed for the (rapid) death of torn love interest male. Instead, Elaine was trying to see the movie Sack Lunch, a light-hearted comedy about a family that is either shrunk to fit into a sack or is regular sized, but somehow placed in an extremely large sack. On her way to the desert, to save her job and atone for her failure to appreciate the English Patient, Elaine is finally about to get to see this fascinating movie mix of Honey, I Shrunk the Kids and... well, maybe it was just Honey, I Shrunk the Kids. But, on her way, she is about to see Sack Lunch before the plane is captured by Dominican terrorists posing as Cuban cigar rollers upset at having been wronged by a crepe business. Of course, the terrorists upon seizing the plane and controlling it, inevitably didn't appreciate the subtle comedy of Sack Lunch, and turned the movie off. Surely, the terrorists would have preferred the English Patient or Atonement. This highlights the difference between Atonement and Seinfeld: Atonement was okay, but Seinfeld was great.

But moving from one halfway decent movie about a person wrongfully accused to another; Sweeney Todd is a movie I have not yet seen. Nor did I see Charlie Wilson's War yet.

But speaking of movies I haven't seen, I did see the movie Juno, which may be the best movie so far this year. Many people have compared it to Little Miss Sunshine, which is not an apt comparison, but its not that far off either. The story lines of the movies are very different, but the heart of Juno, like Little Miss, is heavily character dependant... quirky character dependant. Comparing the characters would be futile because they are nothing alike as Juno's characters are more realistically drawn (and by that, I mean more typical with more common human foibles; like instead of a boy who refuses to speak to honor Nietzche, a boy who has sex with his girlfriend and then distances himself from her (the comedic savante, Michael Cera). Instead of an adorable, yet not pageanty girl who competes in a pageant, there is a pregnant teen (lead, Emily something). Instead of an old codger heroin addict with a sensitive side, there is a former army officer with a sensitive side (J.K. Rowling). Instead of a suicidal homosexual Proust scholar, there is a husband who is not quite ripe for fatherhood (Justine Bateman's brother). Instead of an unsuccessful motivational speaker, there is a step-mom who is critical yet vocally protective of her step-daughter (Alison Janney). Instead of a quiet disapproving wife, there is a controlling disapproving wife (Ben Affleck's wife from Alias). Despite the realism, I would still say Little Miss Sunshine was the slightly superior film.) But, comparing the movies is futile because the characters are so different. Great performance by Juno's lead in making this character likeable despite her penchant for pushing us away. Additionally, I want to compliment the lingual dexterity of the dialogue, which mixes the modern slang of a teenager with 1950's vernacular of a beatnik. Oh, and both movies use a van.
And as a side note, Disney wants to make a film like Juno about B. Spears's sister, who is also a single pregnant teen. What a strange world we live in, and in a world where memorabilia is so prevalent, prominent, and downright expensive, how much do you think the Spears family could get if they gave away the kid to adoption, ($10 million?) I'm not advocating the thought, (I am firmly against the sale of our youth,) but I am curious.

Speaking of Jews, I would like to comment on the comments attributed to Will Smith regarding A. Hitler. First off, I am not sure what exactly he said, in light of the fact that he claims the article was a gross misrepresentation of his views. Second off, even assuming he said "it", there did not appear to be any malice intended with the notion that even evil people don't think they are evil, as they often think they are good. Third off, this is not a Mel Gibson incident, whereby a series of stories have demonstrated a long standing pattern of anti-semitism. Fourth off, this is no Sean Penn incident, whereby a series of stories have demonstrated a long standard pattern of ridiculousness. Fifth off, lighten up my people or you will crush my dream of a Will Smith presidency because Tom Brady has become too much of a villain to be president; although now he's the frontrunner for vice president (although to be non-partisan, he could also easily be a New York senator or governor.)

Happy holidays, Happy New Year, Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, Happy Kwanza, and Happy Festivus,
Papa ME Bear